Love:  The Confluence of Bible and Science

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. (1 Corinthians 13:13, NIV)

Nurture trumps nature; and by far the most important influence on a flourishing life is love.  (George Vailant, “What are the Secrets to a Happy Life” published in The Greater Good by the University of California, Berkeley, August 6, 2013.)

“Love” as the convergence of Paul’s words from the Bible and George Vailant’s words from a 75 year study of men’s lives, is comforting.  The confluence reinforces an age-old interplay between Biblical truth and human lives. 

In the Bible, love is equated with faith, and the lack of love is identified as “nothingness” -- a “clanging of cymbals”.   In Vailant’s lengthy scientific study, love is equated with warm and close relationships, and the absence of those positive relationships forecast a lack of thriving.

These conclusions about the most important ingredient of our well-being are especially relevant for older adults – we who face so many significant changes in our lives.  The stories of the Bible along with the psychological research literature emphasize that change, loneliness, and temptations are serious challenges to our positive relationships -- to our well-being.  We all face those “challenges” as we age.

But “love” does not just happen.  Like most things in life, love needs nurturing in ways that fit the situation.  If a congregation member greets a fellow parishioner with a smile and a word of recognition, the recognized person goes home with feelings mattering.  If a person invites his or her friend to share a meal, that friendship is strengthened.  If a church creates activities that encourage friendship connections and then invites people to participate in those congregational programs, life-giving relationships are created.

Yes, we each need to notice kindness in our community, to see the hope in the present, to hear the message of love in the Bible.  However, creating opportunities that empower and repair meaningful relationships – friendships that embrace faith and love -- are missions for our collective energies.  Developing and sustaining positive relationships in church are truly responsibilities for all of us working together.

Bruce